Monthly Archives: June 2013

Facebook Quotes

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I love my friends and family senses of humor. In person and on social media. Obviously, a lot of this comes from Facebook because that’s how we keep in contact most of the time. So to treat you all, I thought I’d do a Facebook Quote post, to show you what I put up with.

Someone accidently didn’t get a wedding invite and the groom of the wedding said “I didn’t get one either”. Is this not as funny as I think this is?

you ask me white or wheat bread? Might as well ask me if I would have a steak or some dog crap

of course she has a certain allure, a blind man could see that

…my dad was asked if he had showered, and he responded with, “I’ve taken many, I’m 60 years old.”

E now owns 20% of a tractor

Maybe you should ask your baby daddy. (Next Story Time, I explain that)

I’m really struggling here. (I’ll probably end up explaining that one)

Are there walnuts on that Turkey Sandwich? (and this one)

your ball’s in proximity to the hole

So that game going on in your head…are there refs?

He even fired himself one time. It wasn’t pretty

In my dream last night: I couldn’t sleep so I decided to race yo-yos down flights of stairs with Megan and E. It helped wonderfully and I dreamt that I got wonderful sleep
In reality: I was up at 4 am and there were no yo-yos and no Megan and no E and I have been up all morning. Boo!

Why are you so practical when I’m so difficult?

It’s a v.i.p. event a.k.a. God. (said by one of my favorite roommates ever. We were talking about being naked)

I’m going to pray, to God, for a gray robot from Santa

That random dyslexic moment when lions becomes loins. Never a dull moment.

FAMILY NAP TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I love when that’s announced)

You can only lie to your dog so much before he doesn’t believe you

Popped a tire on my way out-of-town and tearfully asked a 16-year-old boy what I should do. Who says I’m not good under pressure.

Back to my life. So today I was finding all the end notes in Don Quixote and all I was doing while looking was singing “The Inquisition, What a show. The Inquisition” (I totally stole that from a Mel Brooks movie.) And then every time I saw a name that wasn’t Don Quixote and it started with Don I yelled Don Pedro for no reason. Who the heck is Don Pedro? And why am I yelling his name probably freaking out my upstairs neighbors?

Those are just a few to get you through your day. Go ahead and make sure you have all of those on your bathroom wall around your mirror to make you giggle a little in the morning. I didn’t have an idea what to post today, so everyone gets funnies from my friends and family. I know, I know, you don’t have to thank me.

So I haven’t talked about boy in like a post. Here’s where we stand. We’re going to try and be friends and every once in a while a flirt will happen. But just the innocent flirting. Because we’re innocent and nothing’s ever going to happen with us. I just admire his dimples. Dimples: Not just for babies anymore.

I Swear I’m not Vain.

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When I was born, I had some serious black hair (I also had special poop, they had to snip the bottom of my tounge because it was attached, and my dad forgot my name, but those are different stories of my birth.) and by the time I was 2, my hair was 2 or so shades away from being albino white. My hair has gotten darker from there. Now, I’m still super blonde but I’m not where I was. This came to me as I was looking at my hair this morning. I was combing it, not being vain. Yeah, okay, I was being a little vain. But when you have long, blonde hair with natural highlights and everyone thinks it’s not God-given, you tend to be a little vain about your hair.

Anyway, back to the real topic at hand. I am not 17 years old anymore. I am not where I was. I’m not even where I was a year ago, personally. But that’s what makes me human. I’m okay that I’m not 17 anymore. I was annoying. I would like to be the weight I was but not my personality. Wow, I needed to be put in my place.

I’m finally caught up with the Jane Eyre series on YouTube. I think I’m nerding out more with this series than The Lizzie Bennet Diaries. And the guy that plays Rochester, just as shady as I hoped he would be. I feel like every other character has to prove themselves to me a little bit more. I don’t know why, but I do. I’m kind of liking Jane though. She’s just as bally as she should be. I’m just taking a while to warm up to her.

I checked out Beautiful Creatures by Kami Garcia & Margaret Stohl. I’m curious to see how I like it and the librarians are curious too. I swear they like pounce on me after I return a book.

Just a Little Short One.

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Now that I’ve mentioned innuendos I see them everywhere. Just like that kid in “The Sixth Sense” seeing dead people. Except dirty.

Last night, I was having a girl night. Not the girl night where you watch “You’ve Got Mail” and paint your toes but the night where you feel less superior to everyone and everything and you wonder what’s wrong with you. You feel just plain insufficient. What did I do? Not talk to boy……he had plans and he REALLY brushed me off. We’re not talking to him. No one talk to him. Do NOT be sucked in by the dimples….Don’t worry, we’re really not that mad at him. He has his own life and it’s not like this is going to last. We’re not even in a relationship. So go ahead talk to him if you know him. (That makes me like a teenager doesn’t it? GAH) But what I did do is I ran back to work to send an email I forgot I really needed to send and then I got these little shelf things for my yarn. I put them together myself. I had to read the directions though. And I still don’t have enough room my yarn. But I made it. And it sure does look good.

I often wonder if guys have the same kind of nights where they feel insufficient. But it’s also really interesting to me how people deal with their insufficiency. I deal with it by being busy cleaning or throwing myself into a book or building shelves. I also angry clean which gets my apartment cleaner like nobody’s business. Picking people’s brains is what I like to do. Odd, I know.

There is a group called Anthem Lights and they did a redo of a song called Don’t You Worry Child. I really like it and I had it on repeat yesterday because it made me feel better. It’s amazing how some of those songs just have the power to make you feel better and bring you peace.

Why has no one informed me that there is a Jane Eyre Series on YouTube? I will be obsessing about this for like ever. Just so everyone knows.

What have we learned today? I’m sucked in by cute dimples, I can make shelves, and I have moments of insufficiency. That pretty much sums it all up. Oh and Jane Eyre….YouTube! YES!

Same Old Rant and my Maidenhead!

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I promise I won’t talk about my maidenhead today. That could be a horrible post. As great of a story as losing my maidenhead would be for a post, I don’t want to tell the internet! Some things need to be private. Maidenhead is one. Anyone hating the major use of maidenhead yet? I’m on the verge of puking because of it. I’ll try to be gentle about it when I talk about innuendos….or not have innuendos. Let’s change the subject shall we?

I went to “Monsters University” last night with my friend R and her son and niece and nephew. It was a cute movie. Me and the son had an argument if he was old enough or not to have seen the first one in theaters. He’s not by 5 years. I tend to have really good, deep conversations with the son. That’s just how I roll.

I was talking to boy (Those dimples, my God. New weakness, right there. Add it to the list with being a bass, wranglers and boots. I know I talk a lot about his dimples but they’re so cute) the other night and I was sitting on the ledge outside my apartment and I have mosquito bites all over. We didn’t even talk that long and I have like a million bites. What’s with that?

Lately, I’ve been thinking about blogging and people’s writing style when they’re blogging. Someone just left a comment on one of my posts that makes me scratch my head. It was like they were trying to impress me with how smart they were but it came off bad because they totally used the wrong wording and it came off redundant the whole way through. Don’t do that to me. I do tend to use a big word here and there, but since using big words aren’t over-populating my speech in real life, they don’t always make on the blog. Talk to me like a college educated 25-year-old. Because that’s what I am. And don’t speak above your education. Example: If you don’t know the meaning of concupiscence, don’t use it. And while we’re at it, let’s remind everyone to try to and at least use the correct spelling of words. I can make out the meaning if you use the correct spelling. It’s not as much of a problem blogging but on social media it is. Makes me want to kick people in the nards when they screw up like that. English Degree, right here. Remember I do judge you by how you speak. I know you’re not supposed to judge but how you speak is how I start figuring out how to react to you, the references I use, the words I use. Everything. I’m not going to make a joke about Austen if you’ve never read Austen. Just remember you don’t need a college education to be smart but you’re not smart because you went to college. Just speak to where you’re comfortable, not above or below.

I think that my problem is that when someone new comes on my blog and I get so excited about new people (I’m a little bit like a puppy in that way because it’s new people and I don’t get many new people. it’s like how I react with coffee, it gives me more energy) and then they post something or I check out their blog and it totally shoots down my over-the-top expectations of them. Which isn’t a bad thing. It’s just I tend to get a little disappointed. But there are a lot of pleasant surprises with people that cross my blog.

And since I’m talking about blogs and I’m thinking about it, I’ve been getting really random followers lately. No, I don’t want to know how I can make money from my blog or how to boost my viewership, I do this because I want to. It’s fun for me. I want people to follow me because they’re entertained by me or they like my taste in books or they like my rants. And I don’t usually go around overly-promoting my blog. I will go and mention a post to someone if it’s applicable. Or I’ll tell someone I mention them. But do not go and promote your blog on my blog if I have nothing to do with or would find no interest in whatever you’re talking about. I know that sounds harsh, but that’s how I’m feeling today.

That was completely more rant-y than I thought I’d be today. Obviously I have some buried feelings about this subject.

Dreams, Boys and Talk about Maiden Head

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I am a believer in dreams. Not the random ones where you’re being chased by evil, murderous clowns but the ones that wake you up and you know in the deepest parts of yourself that there was something true about it. I think that the best part of these dreams is that they come when you least expect it and that they come when you most need them. I look forward to those dreams. I’ve gotten a few that give me closure. But when I get them, they mostly are about one thing……the guy I’m supposed to marry. God must know husband dreams will satisfy me for a while.

Here’s what I’ve put together from my dreams. He has dark hair, he’s decently taller than me,(and coming from a tall girl, that’s great) likes to hold my hand, there’s something special about his eyes and his name is Mike. There was one dream that I called him Moon Doggie. I’m not sure where that came from. Maybe I was watching the Gidget movies that night. Because I know that there might be a few people who will ask, the new guy that I’ve been talking to doesn’t fit all of this list. Like the name and he’s only an inch taller than me if I were barefoot. But he does have something about his eyes and he has dimples. Cute dimples. I’m a fan of his dimples. But last night I was praying and I go “God, I don’t know if this guy’s the one. I have a hard time talking to him. I’m pulling away from him all ready. Is it to soon for me to start pulling away from him, am I not giving him a chance?” Pretty sure right after I prayed that I got that “He isn’t the guy” feeling. Thanks for pointing that out God. I don’t know where this guy road is headed but it’ll be an adventure and I’ll keep everyone updated. And don’t worry, I won’t lead this guy on.

Back to dreams. I did have this one dream my senior year of college where I can assume that it was one of those dreams telling me that it may get tough but I’ll be okay. But that’s an assumption. I also woke from that dream 90 degrees away from a normal sleeping position. I always remember that dream and it kind of reassures me that no matter what’s going on in my life, God’s got me in his hand.

Ionia talked about this today in her post about romance novels, she asked that buxom not be used in a novel. I don’t mind buxom as bad but Maidenhead. Oh my God. It makes me feel violated 8 different ways, maybe 9 on certain days. Like I told Ionia, Maidenhead makes me want to cross my legs and kick any guy in the nards with my boots on if he comes near me, especially if he comes near me with his man banana. This word honestly makes me feel like I should be a helpless girl that doesn’t know how to protect herself against assault.

I know this is kind of a weird combination, dreams and my Maidenhead, but hey, it’s my blog. Deal with it.

Dear Leif Enger. You’re Great.

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“Let me say something about that word: miracle. For too long it’s been used to characterize things or events that, though pleasant, are entirely normal. Peeping chicks at Easter time, spring generally, a clear sunrise after an overcast week-a miracle, people say, as if they’ve been educated from greeting cards. I’m sorry, but nope. Such things are worth our notice every day of the week, but to call them miracle evaporates the strength of the word.

Real miracles bother people, like strange sudden pains unknown in medical literature. It’s true: They rebut every rule all we good citizens take comfort in. Lazarus obeying orders and climbing up out of the grave-now that’s a miracle, and you can bet it upset a lot of folks who were standing around at the time. When a person dies, the earth is generally unwilling to cough him back up. A miracle contradicts the will of earth” (Peace Like a River by Leif Enger page 3)

Last night I was looking at the books I have here, because I don’t have all my books here, and I was trying to decide what to read. This is a long process in which I take a book off the shelf open it maybe read a sentence and then usually it’s put back until I just grab one and walk away from the shelf. I then came upon Leif Enger’s Peace Like a River. It’s a great book and I love the language used in it. The first time I saw this book, it was at the bookstore in Medora and I read the first chapter, which includes the quote above. I was hooked.

It’s amazing that every time I read this passage, it puts me in check. With this book, I love the way Enger puts things but at the end of the book, I kind of scratch my head and say “hmm, I guess”, so I never know how I feel about the book. The book is about a boy who’s family goes and looks for his “murderer” of a brother. You have to read the book to understand. I love Leif Enger’s mastery of language. But I wasn’t less of a fan of his second book, So Brave, So Young and So Handsome I think it’s called. It still has great language, just didn’t grab me like Peace Like a River

Enger is a Minnesota writer and from what I’ve read he writes about the Northern families. To me, his books are like a combination of Huck Finn meets cowboy. Enger’s writing is almost like home for me. I’m 75% sure of this.

I decided that I’m going to trudge through Don Quixote. I had to read part of it in college and found a copy with end notes and a kind of broken spine for fifty cents so I bought it. It’s not got to be a fast read. Might take me years.

Boy Update Remember the guy I was talking about the other day and he was really hard to talk to? We’ve been texting and it’s going better. Now I’m not expecting a relationship out if because there’s a big distance thing going on. Don’t get your hopes up. Though he is…..never mind. I’m keeping that to myself. I can’t tell you guys everything, there has to be a little bit of mystery.

Just One More Day + More!

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I know this week has been super exciting and you are all hyped up on mermaids but we need to calm the heck down. But get through this first part and then I’ll talk about something else other than theories.

I feel like this week I have spent a lot of time talking about theories and maybe making fun of them a little. I’m pretty sure that I have a love affair with conspiracy theories.

Last night my friend R and I were texting back and forth planning on what we’re going to do for her birthday. (going to the Monsters University BTW) Then we started talking about Elvis and she thinks he’s alive, I’m not all that positive. If I remember right, that’s about 36 years of being in hiding. Long time to hide right? Here are some ideas that we came up with.

He’s hiding in the reservation by Mount Rushmore with a Native American wife and reliving his glory days there, also making him a polygamist.

The mermaids have him.

Mexico (yup, the whole country) is holding him hostage and the government doesn’t want to pay the ransom because Elvis has military secrets from when he was in the military in WWII.

Now here’s another question for people to think about. Was there a shooter on the grassy knoll to shoot Kennedy? Here’s my history minor opinion. I think that there may have been someone on the grassy knoll BUT they weren’t working with Oswald because from what I know of Oswald, he would work alone. Now, everything happened with Oswald so that IF there was a grassy knoll guy, they wouldn’t be able to get off a shot because everyone was running around panicked. Win for me. If I remember right, Oswald had some involvement with Russian Communists and probably Cuban Communists but I don’t think that he was working with either of them with this. I think he was just extreme.

NEW TOPIC:

First speaker of the year this Sunday! He’s a guy that does all these different historical figures and he’s doing a buffalo hunter on Sunday. Can’t wait!

It’s another coffee day. I was kind of dragging so I got coffee…….I have an addiction. And who lets me get coffee, seriously? I mean it’s the same result, every time. EVERY TIME! Abundance in energy and 300,000 words a minute out of my mouth.

I’m not reading anything right now because I can’t decide what to read. I have a lot on my list and I do have a book jar but everything that comes out just doesn’t seem good. Talking about that, last night after almost 2 1/2 years of living in my apartment I realized that a lamp next to my bed would maximize my reading non-nook books greatly. Luckily, I had a lamp in my living room I could steal and bring in my room. Why did this take me that long to realize this?

AND now that my work day is over at the museum, I can go home, put my hair up, get ugly and do nothing. Other than make cookies, maybe.

Section I debated about putting in and then put on my big girl pants and just did it because this might be an ongoing topic.

So the last post, post before (?) I talked briefly about actively looking for a significant other. I did sign up for Christian Mingle and started emailing this guy through the site. I totally expected a conversation. Nope. Once again, I expect to much. Yup. I have a habit of doing that. It was me trying to get to know him and him just answering. Now, I’m not really sure because it’s been a while since I’ve been in a get-to-know-you situation but aren’t you supposed to get to know each other through a series of questions going back and forth? I figured he wanted to get to know me since he was the one that initiated it. Ugh. The struggles of being single in a small town. Boo. This would not be so hard if I lived in a more populated place.

I’ve been thinking about doing Christian Mingle for a while because I live in the middle of no where. If you don’t believe me, look for Bowman North Dakota on a map and then see the scarce amount of towns around it. But since I’ve been thinking about it, Christian Mingle ads everywhere. Television, internet, everywhere. So I’m thinking God is trying to give me a hint. I’m not very good at hints so God decided to hit me with a bunch of ads. Well, hopefully this won’t come back to bite me in the behind.